Feb 132012

I would rather eat glass than face another February 14 single. Like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and birthdays, Valentine’s Day is another reminder that I am alone; there’s no one special in my life.

For years, I’ve studied The Law of Attraction. I’ve learned a lot, including:

  • The whole world is comprised of energy, including us.
  • Energy is actually vibration.
  • Everything vibrates including thoughts, and thoughts are propelled by emotions.
  • Everything, emotions too, vibrates differently. Joy, gratitude, and love are at higher frequencies; fear, worry, and anxiety are at lower levels.
  • We attract similar vibrations.

The Law of Attraction responds to whatever vibration we are offering by giving us more of what we are vibrating. It doesn’t decide whether it’s good for us or not; it simply responds to our vibrations. We attract what we feel.

This means that in order to manifest what we are seeking in our lives, we must focus on emotions rather than specific outcomes. For example, if I want more clients, I ask myself what feeling I am truly after.  In my case, it’s the feeling of connection. I love it when I truly connect with a client. And in a primary relationship?  It’s love that I am after; I want to attract more love into my life.

How often do I wait to receive when giving can be just as satisfying?  Too often. I should know better.

This Valentine’s Day, instead of bemoaning the long stemmed roses that never arrived, I just may send a dozen to a friend who is feeling blue. Instead of focusing on what I don’t have, I’ll focus on what I do. And when I do, I will be reminded that I am one lucky man!

Dec 042011

I believe in magic. I believe in a divine order, benevolent spirits, miracles,—and yes—I believe in “the one.”

I know better. Despite what I read in romance novels and see in the gaggle of “chick-flicks” I attend, I know there’s no such thing as “the one,” but still I go on believing.

In an attempt to align what I know with what I believe, I’ve given voice to my crazy thinking; I’ve even had fun with it.

I point to guy after guy asking friends if he could be “the one.” I explain how “he” will complete me and save me from my life. My friends laugh and have even joined in on the game. “Come on and go with us, Randy,” they might say. “You might meet ‘the one.’”

By exaggerating the absurdity of my thinking, I hope to gain freedom from my beliefs. I hope to laugh myself loose.

If laughter doesn’t work, then logical thinking might. I’ve examined why I hold onto this false belief. What is it that I’m afraid I’ll lose if I let it go?

Expectation can be exciting—even exhilarating. It can make the mundane magnificent. Every corner I turn could be the corner where I stumble into “the one.” “He” could be only a heartbeat away. Sometimes anticipation can be more thrilling than the actual outcome we’re hoping for.

But when I really think about it, I know that the true reason I hold onto the idea of “the one” is this: If I let “him” go, I may lose the magic, and a life without magic is more than I can bear.